Relationship advice wasn’t something I thought I would be writing about on here, but due to the ‘un-cuffing’ season I have experienced among of my friends, I would like to share my words of wisdom. And given my goal is to share all things that help people get through their quarter life crisis, I felt this was appropriate.
So, your new fling, boyfriend/girlfriend, ex you can’t get over decided they no longer see you in their future. Now what?
Well, unfortunately, we’ve all experienced a time of unrequited love. A time when you were either dating or ‘talking’ to someone who didn’t like you as much as you liked them. A time when you looked at a person the way The Beast looks at Belle, but Belle’s too infatuated with her books to notice. If you don’t know what I’m referring to, click here. We’ve all been there.
I’m here to remind you it’s not the end of the world. Like, seriously, it’s not. You are perfectly capable of getting over it and moving on. And before you argue that it’s not that easy, this is your
straightforward reminder that it is.
“I just don’t have time to be in a relationship”. “You deserve more than I can give you”. Sure, these might be excuses. But instead of feeling like they’re excuses, why don’t you try to understand that it might be the truth? Maybe they really did think you were a good catch, but their hands just aren’t free to catch you. They might realistically have too much going on in their life to juggle you in it. And isn’t that a great thing for someone to be honest about? It may be hard to hear and you may be trying to avoid hearing it, but that’s vital information you need to know.
Don’t think of it as being let go of. Instead, think of it as moving on and getting that much closer to your person. I’m by far not the most romantic person out there, but I truly believe everyone will eventually find their someone. Remember this: If breakups weren’t a thing, and you were still with the first person you ever dated, would you be happy? I’m pretty confident that most of you have felt your breakups in the past were a blessing, so why can’t this one be too? If you’re no longer crying over your first breakup (or any from the past), congratulations, you got over it. You can do it again.
Don’t resist it. Anything you resist persists. Either you can continue to torture yourself and everyone around you by resisting reality or you can see that it’s over and move on. They made their decision, and that decision did not include you. Take their choice as a blessing. Appreciate the honesty and move on.
Sure, it is absolutely OK to take some time to grieve. But do yourself a favor and don’t let it linger. There’s a blessing in the storm, I promise you. You just have to recognize it and claim it for yourself.
I can truly attest to the blessings that come when you become open to change. Don’t be afraid to reinvent yourself. This is the perfect time to ‘do you’. Explore a new hobby, go out with your friends and really try your best not be upset. Spend some time thinking about what exactly it is that you want for yourself before you get into another relationship. And when a new you emerges you’ll be a better you. And a better you attracts better things. Have some fun and get your irresistible a$$ back on the market.